I think the me I used to know, is somewhere, waiting to be found. In a long forgotten maze that has no exit, is where it probably resides. What it used to look like i dont remember, what it sounded like I cant recall, what it acted like cannot be scripted, because the essense of it got lost with it too. In its place stands a facade that looks, sounds, and acts like it but somehow its incomplete. I think its the essense, yes! I mean it has to be. Think about what happens when the essense of a being can no longer be felt? Yeah… Thats what I thought, its been forgotten.
People always wonder why I feel alone, and they assume the same things, while the gaping hole in my chest continues to grow. I feel hollow and empty, not because of a guy, not because of a friend, but because im missing something. I dont know what it is, and in that dilemma lies my problem. I feel lonely and the reason, doesnt have a name.
In 5 minutes, it will be my birthday. The one day that everyone seems to remember that I exist , Its hard to think that this is the only day you are important to some people. People who haven’t seen you, or talked to you for years, suddenly remember you on this day, make plans to see you soon, when they really don’t plan too, or talk about how much they have missed you, even though you might not have crossed their mind.
In 4 minutes comes the fear of all the messages you will see on your Facebook feed, knowing that most of the statuses will be insincere, that the only reason they wrote HBD! on your wall is because they happened to look to the right and see your name.
In 3,2,1 it all starts and ends . you will receive constant messages for the next couple of hours and then they will stop, as quickly as they began. Its not your birthday anymore. welcome to just another day.
oh and there is the first one…
Imagine a world where “gay” was “straight” and “straight” was “gay”…How Would You Live If You Couldn’t Love?
I honestly feel like, I can be screaming on the top of my lungs and yet nobody hears me.
(21) Tumblr on We Heart It. http://weheartit.com/entry/59181855/via/lovelydreamy
During my senior year of high school, this song from my friends in Patent Pending had a massive effect on my circle of friends as we had a couple of people dealing with some pretty tough times and fairly severe home-life issues. The lyrics to “One Less Heart to Break” really served as a rallying call for not only those at-risk to stay strong, but for a group of friends to bond together and fight endlessly for months to get the help their friends needed. Several of those kids still wear the wristbands with the song lyrics, despite never having been to a concert in their life. It helped a community of teens fight the message their parents and sometimes peers were telling them of “Well, that’s a difficult issue but they’re probably just being dramatic and you should just leave them alone. If it’s really that serious their parents would do something, leave this to adults.” Every single one of those warriors of love has remained a solid support system for their friends, and everyone pulled through with some remarkable recovery stories.
Now, as much as I love music, I’m not one to advocate that a song is some magical solution to solve chronic depression or a horribly neglectful home-life, but it is a source of inspiration to life the hearts of those reaching out for support. That alone can make all the difference in the world.
For me, the journey to making Out of Sight begins on those nights, sitting my a computer with multiple chat windows open, desperately pleading with someone to stay with us long enough for help to come, for some savior to step into the situation. Sometimes those nights would result in long phone calls of continued bargaining for the value of life, or sometimes they’d result in calls to the police because you fear all is lost. Questioning whether you’ve just heard someone’s last words. Night after night, the sacrifices of sleep and emotional distress clearly took a massive toll on my second family of peers and myself, but it’s songs like this that reminded us of what we were fighting for and why we had to stay strong for those we loved.
I’d encourage everyone to check out this wonderful music video, and think about the power words have to completely affect someones way of handling depression, for good and bad. Thank you to my brothers in Patent Pending (Joe Ragosta, Rob Felicetti, Anthony Mingoia, Corey DeVincenzo, and all the rest of the Second Family crew) for relentlessly spreading this message of love and care to thousands. I don’t think you guys can ever truly understand or measure the impact you’ve had on lives, or how much you encouraged me to pursue this project. I’d also like to extend similar thanks to Jon Foreman of Switchfoot, the gents from Abandon, and the entire Skillet crew for similar reasons. Music is a major inspiration in my life and it gives me the strength to keep fighting for those I care about. Finally, a massive thanks to every single one of my dear friends who have rallied for such causes, you know who you are and you know the impact you’ve had on people. Nothing could make me respect you more than those actions.
If anyone watching this project feels alone or wants to talk, our ask box is always open or you can email us at firstname.lastname@example.org .
“It’s the ups and downs of living life this way, promise me you’ll never go away!” (One Less Heart to Break, Patent Pending)
-Kyle Mahaney, co-director of Out of Sight